helen island it’s so easy (2024)
“It’s so easy when your friends are all dead,” proclaims today’s dreamy, haunting song by Paris-based artist helen island—although the sobbing sounds woven into the pulsing synthesizer leave no doubt that mourning someone you love is of course anything but easy.
When grieving the loss of a loved one (not only loss through death but also through break-ups, falling-outs, relocations etc.), a part of our brain called the basal ganglia can become overactive. This part deals, among other things, with the reward and pleasure we gain from social interactions with people we are close to.
When the basal ganglia become overactive due to us being separated from a loved one, things that we associate with this person—their favorite song, the street they lived on, the perfume they wore—neurologically remain associated with a social interaction that feels rewarding. Paired with the factual absence of whoever we are grieving, encountering these reminders can lead to a craving of their presence that, according to recent psychological research, is in many ways similar to addiction-related cravings.
In other words: helen island’s lyrics notwithstanding, our very brain desperately needs our friends to remain with us—alive, that is.
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